This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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