Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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