I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
