So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
