i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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