It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize