It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize