After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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