I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
