I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
