Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
