As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize