Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
