So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
