is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
