its not stalking. its research.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
