OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
