ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
