I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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