So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
