I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize