Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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