Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
