Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
a search helicopter?!
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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