I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
