names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize