so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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