mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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