we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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