Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize