Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
