you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
