God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I woke up under a house in Key West
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
