Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
