Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Randomize
