Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
