I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Randomize
