YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
