It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
