You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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