Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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