Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize