dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
