i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
