she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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