No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
