I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
