Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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