He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
