i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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